Motherhood as a Spiritual Initiation with Sarah Caracciolo

[00:00:00] Hey there dear ones. We have an amazing episode for you today and our guest is Sarah Caracciolo, and she is actually a winner of a Share the Love Podcast competition that I held a few months ago whereby the Grand Prize winner. Won a guest spot on Soul Guide Radio, and this is truly the best prize I could possibly give.

[00:00:25] So, you know, for future podcast competitions, you know, hey, this is a big prize, so be on the lookout for those. Uh, and if you enter, you could win. A potential guest spot on my dear dear podcast, soul Guide Radio, and today Sarah and I are talking about spiritual initiations and it’s such a powerful conversation.

[00:00:48] But before we get into any of that, I would love to share with you a listener review and this. Review comes from Joshua Gruber and he’s talking about the podcast episode titled It’s All Just So Weird, and we’ll link to that episode if you haven’t had a chance to check it out. And he says, what a beautiful episode.

[00:01:09] Thank you, Joshua. I’ve always been nervous to share some of my spiritual experiences, but now I know that my experiences may be what someone needs to hear. Yes, they do. Allyson always finds a way to make these concepts easily accessible to everyone, no matter where you are on your journey. So extremely grateful and Joshua.

[00:01:31] I’m so extremely grateful for you. Thank you for this feedback. It truly is what I try to do in this podcast and in the work I do as a spiritual interpreter, to take these profound concepts and translate them into something that’s easy to understand and integrate. Into your experience, which is what we’re gonna be doing today.

[00:01:51] Sarah and I talk about a lot of big spiritual concepts, and we break them down into how it worked out in our lives. We talk about motherhood, we talk about our struggles, and we talk about our growth and evolution in ways that our. In service to you, so let’s get to it. In today’s episode, Sarah and I talk about how motherhood and other big life changes are actually spiritual initiations, why initiations are often jarring or intense, and how to tap into and amplify your intuition during these big life experiences.

[00:02:28] We’ll end on an invitation that will have you embracing your spiritual initiations to receive all the amazing downloads and awareness your higher self is trying to send you. So please stay with us until the end. Welcome to Soul Guide Radio, a podcast for soul guided leaders influence. And entrepreneurs here to bring about change on a massive level.

[00:02:54] We’ll explore how you can activate your big soul mission, amplify your spiritual gifts, and clear the energy blocks weighing you down so you can gain unstoppable momentum in life and business. I’m Alison Scammel, your host and soul guide.

[00:03:18] Hello. We’re creating a global community of soul guided leaders, coaches, healers, and entrepreneurs called the Soul Guide Circle. In the Soul Guide Circle, we’re inviting in our spiritual gifts to get our clients even more results in transformation and create. Massive referral buzz. Find the link to join our closed Facebook group@ allysonscammell.com or in the show notes.

[00:03:40] Today’s guest is Sarah Caracciolo. She is a holistic postpartum coach and intuitive healer who helps mamas heal and recover from postpartum insomnia. Anxiety and depression. She’s a certified Martha Beck life coach and equals coach, Reiki master, and has her degree in psychology. Sarah uses her intuitive abilities and skills to help her clients heal at a root level.

[00:04:05] We had an absolutely amazing conversation exploring variety of spiritual topics. Please enjoy.

[00:04:23] Hello, Sarah. Welcome to Soul Guide Radio. Hi Allyson. It’s so nice to see you. Yay. I am so happy. Uh, Sarah and I have known each other for a long time. I think we initially got connected through the Martha Beck. Tribe. Yeah. Yep. Yeah, I think so. You were in the um, master training and I met you through like one of the courses you were offering to like the other MBI coaches.

[00:04:50] Oh, that’s right. Wow. That’s right. You were doing, it was awesome ’cause you were doing the work, but you did it in your own way ’cause you like added something else to the work and I was like, oh, I like this. It adds like this other layer to it. It was EFT. Oh, that’s what it was? Yeah. Okay. I love that. You know, that is like, you make me think like even today, after all, you know, this is like, we’re talking like 10 years ago.

[00:05:16] You and I have known each other a long time, maybe not quite 10, but like, maybe like eight years ago. Um, and like those are still the most powerful practices. I I still do them to this day. To this day, the work is one of. It, it, it was a tool that like changed my life and it’s still something I come back to, to just keep moving the needle forward, you know?

[00:05:41] Absolutely. I’m the same way and um, with all the energy work I do and, um. And I really find that it works, like when I’m up in my head blaming something Yeah. On somebody else, and then I pause and in, in the work, Byron Rady Turns, uh, teaches you how to really identify the limiting thoughts and then turn them around to the different perspectives.

[00:06:04] So if you think, you know, my husband isn’t listening to me, if you turn it around to the self, you know, I’m not listening to me. And I always find that turning it around to this. Self. Mm-hmm. Always is like, aha. Mm-hmm. Oh yeah. I’m not listening to myself, am I? Or whatever the example is. Mm-hmm. I know. It’s so powerful.

[00:06:22] I love it. And yeah, I just love that that’s how, how we met, you know, and uh, how we’ve, we’ve both evolved and like different ways and it’s just wild how life just continues on, you know what I mean? So I’m just so glad to be here and chat about Yeah. Motherhood and the, I think the spiritual initiation that I experienced well, or when I became a mom, and then how it just really up the ante when it came to me doing the inner work and like healing on like a really soul level.

[00:07:01] Like I thought, I was like, you know, I, I’ve been on this path for. Over 10 years. And I was like, I got it. Like I am, you know, I’ve done the work. I’m a coach. I like, I’m, I, I feel like I, I got to this like plateau, if you will. Like, I’m good. You know? And then you become a mom and they talk about baby blues, you know, oh, you might experience some baby blues.

[00:07:26] Okay. Didn’t really think anything of it. I was like, oh, I’ve been depressed in my day. Like, okay, I can handle that. You know? And then, yeah. Becoming a mom just flipped everything around and I feel like I had to start at ground zero and you were with me in some of those like really hard moments because of the sleep stuff that I was going through.

[00:07:47] So while it sucked going through all of that, I feel like it really helped me heal at like a soul level and like my intuition just got so strong, you know? Yeah, so I guess we’re just gonna dive right in. I love diving right in. Yeah. And um, I love this topic because I do think that mo, like motherhood is such an initiation and there’s lots of different ways to mother.

[00:08:14] So if you don’t have a biological cla uh, child, there’s so many different ways we are initiated into that motherhood of caretaking for something that’s vulnerable or precious or needs help. Um, and it’s a, this is such a personal topic for me because. I had, um, I definitely believe, although I never really got it diagnosed until about a year later, um, and the, the therapist said, oh, it is likely that you had post-traumatic, uh, uh, uh, how do I say that?

[00:08:47] PTSD. PTSD, postpartum PTSD. Yeah, because I had a very, very traumatic birth. And then my traumatic birth was also, and this is, I think a lot of us. Have this without realizing it, it was triggering a lot of past lifetime trauma. Around birthing and losing children in past lifetimes. So it, it’s horrible in your current lifetime, but you’re also like poking the bear of trauma that’s so big inside of you and you don’t even realize it.

[00:09:16] And then you have this little life form that you have to care for and you’re not sleeping. And none of us really have, you know, in the modern world, we don’t live in client. Clans and tribes and extended families so you can just pass the baby off to the auntie or the sister when you need to sleep. I mean, I know you didn’t have that, Sarah and I Sure as hell didn’t have that.

[00:09:35] No, I didn’t have that. And you know what’s interesting is elephants, they breastfeed for six. Sears and I was like, no way. But it makes sense. It’s like they’re born, I don’t think they’re called a pod, but like the elephant is born into, they’re called families I think. Yeah. So you have like the uncles and the aunts and the cousins and the siblings and they’re all caretaking for the young, you know, here we are like on our own individual streets, in our own individual home, away from everyone trying to like do it all.

[00:10:03] And it’s actually impossible because I feel like our biology. Is to be in community and to be in tribes. And it’s like, we can get back there, but it’s going to take so many generations to to, to build the tribe. So like you hear it like, we have to build the tribe. Well, it’s not gonna happen overnight and like it’s going to take time.

[00:10:25] And it’s kind of like, in a sense, our responsibility to do that, which is like, wow, let’s just add something else to our plates that we have to do as new moms, you know? Um. So it’s just like, yeah, it’s just different than how we used a mother, you know? And I think that’s part of it. I also think what I learned was that we all go through this thing called trece, which is a ch, it’s like as dramatic of a change as adolescents.

[00:11:00] So you know how we talk about adolescence, like it’s a hard time in most people’s life, right? Like, who am I? What do I want? You’re like 15, 16. The hormones are crazy. It’s like, for me, that was one of the hardest times in my life, right? And then trence is when you become a mother and it’s a. It’s like as drastic of a change, physiology, physiological, physiological change, emotional change, physical change that a person will go through in their life and no one talks about it.

[00:11:31] You are like, why do I feel crazy? Oh, because my brain is literally, literally changing and I’m not who I used to be and. There’s so many changes that are going on in our bodies that we’re not aware of, and there’s not a lot of talk about it, right? So I think if we talk about it more of like, oh, this is a thing called trence.

[00:11:48] It takes like three years to feel like yourself again. I don’t think that we would internalize our suffering, the anxiety, the depression, whatever we’re experiencing, and make ourselves wrong. We would just be like, oh, this is part of the process. How can I support myself in this time? Do you know what I mean?

[00:12:08] I absolutely do, and it, it is such an important topic because I remember after I had Fran and I was processing the, the, this PTSD from the birth itself, um. I wrote about it at that time, I, and actually that’s when I was going through Martha Beck’s master certification program, and at that point in time, the program had a lot of writing.

[00:12:33] I think Martha was in her writing books phase. So of course you wanna teach what you’re into. So she was doing a lot of like writing, writing, writing, and writing your vulnerable stories. So at that point in time, I was like, all right, the most vulnerable ass thing I can talk about by far is the birth of my child.

[00:12:49] That really just, mm-hmm. Did everything you talked about to me, it just threw me in this place that I can’t believe. And I had Freya a little bit later in life. I was 40 years old and I’m like, I can’t believe I’m a 40-year-old woman. And I’m like, I’m just paralyzed right now. Right? So I wrote about that and I wrote some pretty damn good articles about it.

[00:13:08] I’ll link one, one, um, got got published in the Elephant Journal and I’m gonna, I’ll link in the show notes for. Anyone who might be interested in it. But, um, some of the publications that I submitted to, which were publications for, uh, pregnant mothers or new mothers, they wouldn’t publicize it because they didn’t want to quote scare new moms.

[00:13:29] Mm-hmm. And I said to them, but. This is what I wanted to know, right? I, I went in blind to this pregnancy about what could happen. I was so unprepared and I read the books and I went to the meetings and I went to the classes and I was like, I was so unprepared for this. Birth trauma or this huge change you’re talking about.

[00:13:48] Right. So let’s talk about it. And I was so upset when they were like, Nope. Uh, we’re not gonna know. Like, and it was like a door. It wasn’t even like a we pass. It was like slam door in face, don’t come back. Oh, yeah. It is not, and I, I always ask myself this, like, okay, when I was pregnant, I had a lot of fear around giving birth, right?

[00:14:10] So like I had to process a lot of that. I had to do a lot of coaching and just like process this fear. But I didn’t have the space to know like how to prepare for motherhood. Do you know what I mean? Like the only thing that I got from my midwives was, oh, you may experience baby blues. So then while you’re talking, I’m like, yes.

[00:14:30] And how? How do we prepare moms and do we, and can they take that on? Do you know what I mean? Like, are they able to take that on and what could they take on? Because I feel like. Yeah. Had I been a little bit more prepared, I guess I just need to ask myself this, like what would’ve helped me felt, feel more prepared?

[00:14:52] Because the last thing I thought I was going to experience was postpartum insomnia. Like I was such a good sleeper. I never thought about sleep. Up until giving birth. And then because I wasn’t sleeping a lot, I got anxiety about not sleeping and it turned into this whole thing that I’m still healing from, you know?

[00:15:14] So it’s like, I guess that’s the question. Like how do we prepare mothers for something that like, we just don’t know what’s going to happen and they’re caring, they’re holding so much for like the birth, you know? But I think that we can do a better job. Do you know what I mean? I do. And there is something about not, I, I, there is a thing about let’s not scare the new mothers.

[00:15:36] You know, like there is, that’s a thing. And I didn’t wanna be scared when I was a new mother, but I think it’s just this Sarah. Yeah. It’s just telling our stories. I agree. Just sharing our stories and like we all know that every mother goes into motherhood differently and experiences something different.

[00:15:50] Right. You had the postpartum insomnia. I had the postpartum PTSD. Right. My sister who’s had other things in her life, she. Flowed into motherhood. Like the biggest breeze. Breastfeeding was no problem. She was like, mother Earth, just right. One minute. I’m working full time and the next minute I’m a mom and I’m doing it all.

[00:16:11] It was so easy for her, like she just. I had the most opposite experience that she had. Right. It was such a jarring transition for me. But there’s other things in my life that has been so useful for me and so difficult for her. So I kind of, that’s what I was gonna ask you. Why do you think some people have harder experiences and some people have e easier experiences?

[00:16:35] ’cause I can find myself being like. You know, trying to hold space for new moms and, and that’s what I love doing. And some of my friends were like, I’m good. Like, I don’t like, I like, this is easy. And I’m like, what? Like I’m so confused. I know. It is true. You know, I just think it’s. Our core wounds, right? I think.

[00:16:54] Mm-hmm. This is such a spiritual conversation. It gets down to core wounds and like I know I had a lot of past lifetime trauma around birth, around losing chi children at young ages around myself, not having the kind of birth that I wanted to have. Um. Uh, yeah. And so I think it was one of my, definitely the birth of Freya was a huge soul contract I had.

[00:17:20] So soul contract is just something you agreed to on a so level that you needed to experience. It’s almost always a challenge. And usually the bigger soul contracts are the bigger challenges. Something you meant to confront, heal from, grow from learn from, so that you can evolve to the next level of your potential.

[00:17:35] Right. And I think those of us who really had this sort of big initiative initiating experience in a motherhood, it’s highly likely we have this whole contract around. Right. It all I agree. And what do you think, like if someone is going through, you know, an initiation? For me, it just feels like. And I’d love to hear your thoughts too.

[00:17:56] It’s like, I know I’m going through initiation and when I’m in it, I don’t really know I’m in it, but when I’m kind of on out of it or I can see it from afar and I’m like, that was really fucking hard. Like that was intense. That almost killed me. I feel like that those are like initiations, right? For me.

[00:18:16] So I guess my question for you is like, okay, what’s an initiation? How do you know you’re going through initiation? And if someone is going through initiation and they’re like, well, I don’t know, maybe I did have a past life. Maybe this is a sole contract. Like how can they start inquiring within to like maybe be, have, have like that revealed to them?

[00:18:36] Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Well, so how I describe initiations, I put it in the context of. Energy, energetic growth, and when we go through accelerated periods of energetic growth, it’s like a growth spurt, right? Of our energy, of our, of our soul, of our soul, a growth spurt of our soul, if you will.

[00:18:58] There’s almost always an initiation in there. There is not almost always, there is always an initiation in there, and an initiation is usually confronting a big fear, going through a big experience, a big catalytic event, and the big initiations usually have a jarring feeling to ’em like mm-hmm. I know we both had this sort of jar, I felt so jarred into motherhood.

[00:19:20] It’s like heard for and I was just jarring. Amazing. Awesome. The best thing ever. Like we haven’t talked about that, but like, yes, the blanket statement is this, you know, the best thing to happen, right? So for anyone who is out there thinking about children and haven’t had kids. Like truly Have we scared you?

[00:19:36] Yeah. Just have to say it. We have to say it right, Sarah? Like, I think about it, I think about it like, Freya is like, I think about my life without Freya and I al I always think, well that would be meaningless. Like this is my experience. Right? So you can be a person without kids and have a super, super meaningful life.

[00:19:53] But like the point is Freya has brought so much meaning to my life. Yeah. And so, so, so, so worth it, right? So worth it. Yes. I like yes a hundred times. Oh, and it can be both and. Yes, and it can be both and mm-hmm. And usually our biggest challenges are where we’ve had our biggest happiness and bliss. Like not always, but often, especially like on these like sort of initiations you’ll sometimes find, sometimes a challenge is just a shitty challenge, but you’ll oftentimes.

[00:20:23] Fine in this initiation. It’s both wonderful and horrible at the same time, or aspects of it are wonderful and aspects are horrible at the same time, and it’s this jarring thing. Usually you haven’t had too much time to prepare for it, right? Usually your spirit guides or your higher self. So if you’ve a, if you have quite a connection to the higher self or a spirit guide or source, they usually don’t give you too much heads up.

[00:20:46] I mean, I’m a psychic medium. And I went to my divine guidance team after the birth of Freya, and I said, what the F? Mm-hmm. Why didn’t you warn me that this was gonna be so hard? And they were like, this is just, I think that’s part of the initiation. You don’t get a lot of prep for it. It is a sort of, it’s a zap.

[00:21:08] Yeah. It’s so funny ’cause I was listening to this podcast and I love that you share that because this woman was like, she had her second kid and she, she was like very intuitive at a, at a, at a small age. And then she got very like, if you can’t prove it, it’s not real. Right. And got very like left brain.

[00:21:28] And then when she became a mom, it came back online and when she had her second kid, she was like, I knew something was going to happen. Like, I just felt like this was gonna change my life. Like having this second kid was gonna change my life and she had an NDE when she gave birth to her second kid, and mm-hmm.

[00:21:48] It was like, and then that, just like what she, she was saying, she’s like, and I just gave birth and I had this baby in my, in my arms. And the only thing that was coming through was like all of these messages about how I’m meant to like serve my soul’s purpose and like what the messages is. And I got all these downloads and she was like, I’m supposed to be just like loving my baby.

[00:22:08] And I just have all these like, this is what you’re meant to do in this lifetime. You need to start doing it. This is your soul’s purpose. Start now. You know? And just got all of these downloads. I was like. Wow, that that’s amazing. Like, yeah, it just like has me. I’m kind of thinking, well, this is like going way off topic, but I just feel like when I also became a mom, I was like, I put so much pressure on myself to be successful before I became a mom.

[00:22:37] And then when I did become a mom, I was like, I don’t have the bandwidth or the capacity to put any energy into my business right now. Like this is taking everything I have to just like be okay mentally, emotionally, and to take care of my kid. But I did have a bunch of downloads like. When it came to postpartum insomnia and anxiety and holding mother circles and holding space for moms, and like, I feel like that is what really what I’m being called to do.

[00:23:04] But I guess my question, what my, the question that’s coming up for me now is like, okay, so when people get downloads, this is what I’m meant to do. This is my calling. How, how come some people have like this like huge push to do it and like they put it into the world and you like. And and they do it. They put it into the world and some people choose not to, or they, they do it, but they don’t get the results that they want.

[00:23:34] Do you know what I mean? Because I feel like we all have our purpose here. I feel like we all get downloads. I feel like we all know why we’re meant to be here in this moment in time. It can always change. And so we have this like soul’s purpose. But I think for some people, including myself, it’s not linear.

[00:23:53] It’s not like this linear thing that like, oh, I have this sole purpose. This is what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna put it out into the world. There’s so many things that can happen when you start actually putting your work into the world. The self-doubt and the resistance and like I would actually rather go hiking than do work.

[00:24:07] Like the consistency. There’s so many things. So I guess I’m just so curious, like what, yeah, what do you see like. We all have these like messages and. Some people are more successful in getting them out into the world than others, which is no hate on anyone. I just see this in myself and in clients. So I love to hear your perspective.

[00:24:29] This is very off topic. Yeah, topic. But I don’t think it is actually, I think of a thread. It’s all threading together and I, I think we’ll segue nicely into intuition, um, and awakening intuition through motherhood and other initiations in your life. I think. Starts that. There’s several ways to respond to that.

[00:24:46] I think it starts with human design. Mm-hmm. In that you and I are both projectors. Mm-hmm. We have open tack roles. If you read any, anything on projectors, the first thing they say is if you’re a mom who’s a projector, get help. You are not like. Ma Ingles on the prairie, caring for five kids. You know, feeding the animals like just going all day.

[00:25:09] Sorry, that’s fresh on my brain because I’m reading these books to my daughter and I’m like, my God, ma Ingles, she was a rock star. Like we are just not designed for that, right? I’m not designed for that. No, we need help, especially any open sacral folk. So manifesters, projectors, reflectors, we are just designed to help.

[00:25:29] Now, generators are manifesting generators. You are also designed for help, but you may find that you have more consistent access to energy to get through the long nights of, you know, early days of motherhood and all that stuff. So my point in saying that is like you were talking about, like I was just in survival mode when I had my baby and I was too.

[00:25:49] And I think part of that is projector energy. Like we literally cannot be like, oh, I had a baby and now I’m just gonna keep running my business and, and raise my baby and do all my thing. Like my sister’s a generator. She just went to back to work and it was all just like, you know, she was going and it was all so good and I just had this sort of shutdown.

[00:26:08] And I’m like, okay, I can only take one thing at a time. And once I figure out the baby thing then and maybe then, and I don’t know, I’ll think about adding work on too. And that’s the beauty of running your own business. And thank God I had a partner that allowed me the luxury of even having that choice and conversations.

[00:26:25] I feel very blessed. And so the point of me mentioning all this is a lot of our human design types. Some of us just have more waiting and some of us, like I have got the sixth line, I don’t really like step into my role model hood until I’m 50. I turn 50 next year. So I’m like, you know, if you’re a sixth line, you’re likely not gonna be a super big success at a young age.

[00:26:48] Or if you are, it’s not aligned success. You will not experience aligned success until you’re later in your fifties and even your sixties. Right? Mm-hmm. So a lot of us just have this waiting and this divine timing. Mm-hmm. We’ve got the downloads. Mm-hmm. But it’s just not the right time to act. And I will say.

[00:27:07] Sometimes we can appear, see on social media, someone’s like, yeah, I got these downloads and now I’m doing it and I’m fulfilling my soul mission. And it’s also awesome. And then maybe that’s true, but maybe that’s just a lot of social media sort of flash. And then other of us are doing things in subtle ways and it’s showing up subtly in our life here and with our spouse and with our family, and it’s actually much bigger than we are giving it credit.

[00:27:31] Yeah, I agree. And I feel like, like I said before, I became, I became a mom. I define success in a, in a specific way. And now it’s like success is like, it’s like do I feel happy when I wake up? Do I feel at peace with myself? Am I getting along with my husband? Am I connecting to the trees when I go into nature?

[00:27:56] Like do I feel. Fulfilled in a way that I’m connecting to my intuition and my yeah. Intuitive nature on a daily basis. That really fills me up. You know what I mean? It’s like, am I spending time with friends? Do I have quality friendships that like are meaningful to me? You know? And I think. It went out of the ego of like, this is what success looks like.

[00:28:22] I need to make X amount of money by X amount of time. I need to manifest everything on my fucking vision board. Like, oh my God, if I hear that one more time, I’m gonna lose my shit. But like, and now it became just of like, how do I wanna feel in my being? And I feel like I, that will come back of like putting.

[00:28:43] Effort into my business again. But I have two days of childcare, you know what I mean? So like on those days, what do I wanna do? Like spend time with horses and go on a hike or work, which I love my work, but it’s like every week is different. And I think just checking in with myself every week and knowing that I can change my mind.

[00:29:03] Maybe today I do wanna record a video for, for YouTube, ’cause that feels inspiring. And maybe tomorrow I’ll go on a hike. Being able to change my mind and knowing that I will change my mind and to continue to check in with myself about like what actually is going to fulfill me. Do you know what I mean?

[00:29:20] Mm-hmm. So it was actually a blessing becoming a mother because that whole like pressure of being successful, it actually like went into raising my child. And so I’m like, I don’t have the capacity to do both, and like, this actually feels fulfilling and I’m okay with it. Yeah. You know what I mean? Does that make sense?

[00:29:37] It makes so much sense. I just feel called to share. I just had a session with a client yesterday and she’s gonna be 77 in a few months. Wow. Yeah. Yay. Amazing. And she, she’s been plagued her whole life and she got it from her mom and her, her former husband, about like, you know, you are not. Essentially, you know, you’re not enough, you’re failing, you know, uh, they were all measuring success by how much money you made.

[00:30:01] And, and she’s been trying to become a coach and let’s, let’s say the last five, maybe 10 years. But before that, she was a therapist. So she’s been at this, you know, for a long time. And even when she was a therapist, you know, the, her husband’s like, well, you’re not making enough money. You don’t have enough clients.

[00:30:16] And it was just never enough. So she had so much wounding around that. We’ve just done so much healing around it and, and what I’ve seen, and she’s been a long-term client of mine and I just absolutely love her to bits. Uh, what I’ve seen in her in the last year has just been extraordinary. She’s found love.

[00:30:35] She’s repairing relationships with her son. She has found a church. She’s singing. I’m kind of outing her identity right now. I love that. Um, sharing a lot about her, but, oh, I dunno. Her, yeah, she wouldn’t mind. She totally wouldn’t mind. Um, she’s singing, she’s a, a, a leader in her church. She has this friendship circle.

[00:30:54] She’s going to the gym. She’s lost weight. But our last session yesterday, she was like, I don’t have clients. I’m failing. Mm. So the first thing we did was heal all the bullshit around, I’m failing, right? Then I asked her, do you actually want a client? She’s also a projector, by the way, right? I said, do you actually want a client right now?

[00:31:15] You’ve got a church thing. You’ve got your new romantic partner, you’ve got family, you’ve got grandkids. Do you actually want clients right now? And she said. I don’t, but I may. Like, I may, and I said, yes, you may. She said, I’ve done all this work. I feel like I have all this to give La, la, la, and I, yes. All of that, but it’s okay not to want clients right now and not to have them and be super, super successful.

[00:31:38] Mm-hmm. Just. Check in with yourself, give yourself permission to have no clients right now and not pursue clients right now. Mm-hmm. And usually when we’re not pursuing clients is when they just land in our laps. Right, right, right. And they said check in in September, check in October. Yeah. And then ask yourself, how many do I want one?

[00:31:56] Right. Two. Right, right. And agenda, like I love that question of like, well, do you actually want clients? Because it’s like, whose agenda is it? Is it ours or is it societies or is it something you see on social media like. Because I feel like so often it’s actually not ours. You know? It’s like what we’ve just taken on.

[00:32:17] And I feel like that question is so powerful because it’s like, well, what do you actually want? And like when you, when you, and if you do want clients, that’s great, but what are, what are we making it mean? Do you know what I mean? Well, if we have clients, then we’re this, and we don’t have clients we’re that.

[00:32:32] Do you know what I mean? And it’s like, I don’t know. I just think that’s so. It is. So 3D, do you know what I mean? Because it’s the ego’s way of like staying in control. And I feel like when we like go into like love, which is, this is a question I’ve asked myself so many times throughout the last three years when I was really in the like deepest, darkest days of postpartum insomnia.

[00:33:00] I was like, what would love say to me? And. I don’t, whenever I ask myself that, it’s like, it’s such a kind and loving response, and the answers always, they always just lead me to exactly what I need in that moment, which isn’t like, you need to have this and this and this by X, Y, and z, da da, da. It’s like, it’s so loving and kind.

[00:33:25] Do you know what I mean? So I love that you asked that question, like, what do you want? And like, what would. Love say to you right now if you’re really in a hard time and you’re putting pressure on yourself, or if you’re newly into motherhood or you’re just like having a hard time in general, like what would love say to you?

[00:33:44] You know? I love that question. And you know, getting back to this client, I’m sure the voice in her head was that of her mom. Yeah. And her, her late husband saying, you need clients to Right. Be worthy. Right, right. Because that’s our litmus test. And this 3D metrics, yeah. Is client success, no clients not success.

[00:34:04] Right. And then when she released that and got to the question of what would love call for you? The answer was hanging out with my new partner. Yeah. Doing my church event that I’m leading, singing, hanging out with friends, being with my family this summer. Love that. You know, love that. Continuing to repair the relationship with my son.

[00:34:23] I mean, what, what’s more meaningful than that really. I know. Um, so it was just beautiful. It was just beautiful. Yeah. I love that. And like, how cool to experience that when you’re 77, you know what I mean? Like. Yeah, it’s just like we’re always evolving and we’re always growing, and there’s so much more to like uncover about ourselves.

[00:34:48] You know? I keep saying, I’m like, okay, I think I got it. Like, I don’t, I, I think I’m good with Earth. Okay. Like, all right, let’s just chop it off. All the lessons and everything I need to learn and like. I think I’m good for a bit, you know? Totally, totally. Well, you know, I think like, you know, they talk about our different initiations in life, you know, motherhood for sure.

[00:35:10] Turning 50, you know, the Chiron return. I’m about to hit that and I’m like, oh, I hope my initiation is an easeful one. ’cause I’m just not in the mood for a big jarring something. The Chiron return, similar as like the Saturn return when you’re 27 to. It’s like 20 to 30. Is it similar or no? I think so.

[00:35:28] Chiron is a wounded healer, right? Yeah. So the Chiron return, I think is like, you know, you’re, it, it is, it’s an, it’s a. It’s also an intuition boost. Mm-hmm. You know, that Crohn’s wisdom, the wisdom of the wise woman, right. Um, you do get an intuitive boost through Chiron return and I, I think it’s kind of like your last like, and astrologers, correct me if I’m wrong, but my understanding is that it’s one of the last big sort of resets resetting you to your soul mission.

[00:35:59] The work I’m here to be do the person I’m here to be, so that you kind of like. As you finish your life cycle, you have this like last reset towards that. So if you’re out really out of alignment to it, which I’m totally not, I’m like so in alignment, right? Maybe it will be there, it’ll be not a big reset, but I think for some people who are, you know, I think about, you know, maybe my mom, you know, when she went through it, like when you get quite out of alignment, it can be right, you can get jarred back into alignment, right?

[00:36:30] Yeah, no, what do I agree? Yeah. Well, I don’t agree. I’m not, well, I don’t know. I’m not, I’m not 50 yet, but I, I know you’ll have to let me know how would it happen? I have to do more, uh, research into Chiron return ’cause it’s, I’m knocking on its door and I’m a sixth line. So this, if, if you’re a sixth line in human design, it’s kind of turning fifties, kind of a big, like you become, it’s when you really step into the role model work.

[00:36:56] So I love that. Yeah. I, I forgot what’s your profile lines? Do you remember? No, no worries. I have no idea what my human design is. No worries. I, yeah, that’s also one thing I threw out after I became a mom. I was like really into astrology and all this stuff and I was like, I don’t have a done or bandwidth to even like be with this right now, you know?

[00:37:17] But totally. Erin said that every seven years, and tell me if you agree with this. Every seven years there’s like a spiritual upgrade. Oh wait, is it every seven years? No. Is it every seven years that you’re. DNA or your, your cells regenerate or she was saying basically saying me every seven years, I’m totally botching this.

[00:37:37] You go through another Yeah. Spiritual upgrade. So like, yeah. Is that right? That’s right. Yeah. Every seven years, I think your whole body is completely regenerated in terms of like old skin falling off, new skin. Like you’re like a completely regenerated person like about every seven years. Um. And that also physically, and then that resets you energetically, right?

[00:38:05] I’ve heard that. I don’t know a whole lot about it, but it seems to make sense to me. But what I would love to kind of, uh, uh, go into and then we can kind of wind our, our, our lovely episode down, which I’ve having just an amazing time chatting with you about this, um, to talk about this intuition. Um, and when we do get this, these boosts of intuition when we go through mother motherhood and other initiating experiences in our lives, so how did you experience that?

[00:38:32] A boost in intuition or how would you even describe that sort of awakening of any of your spiritual gifts through Yeah. Process? Well, before I became a mom, I, um, I think I’ve always been intuitive. Like I’m a very highly sensitive person, so I’m very like in touch with, uh. Well, I wasn’t for, well, I was, and then I wasn’t, and then I became more in touch with myself after I did all this work.

[00:38:58] Um, but I think I’ve always been in touch with my intuition. I think when I started trying to become pregnant, um, I was in a mystery school for three years and that really helped me. Um, and then while I was trying to become pregnant, it wasn’t easy for me. It took me like. A year and a half, and my sister and I are two years apart and she went through her own journey with IVF.

[00:39:22] And so, um, it was really hard that first year and a half of like, trusting that I knew I was gonna get pregnant ’cause I felt it. But then every month seeing a negative sign or a Yeah. Um, not positive. And so when I did become pregnant, it was this, I, I wanna share the story because this really leads up to like what.

[00:39:44] Help me really tune into my intuition in like a stronger way because I feel like. When you wanna become pregnant, it’s, it’s an emotional rollercoaster, especially if it takes a long time. And right now infertility is just like skyrocketing, which is just so heartbreaking. And so a lot of people are going through this really hard time of trying to become pregnant.

[00:40:07] So for me, it took us like a year and a half and my sister was doing IVF and we always wanted to be pregnant together. And I was like, okay, well we’re not getting pregnant naturally, so maybe I’ll do this thing called IUI. It’s like. It’s like the fertility treatment you do before IVF, right? It’s not. I, I, correct me if I’m wrong, everyone who’s listening, it’s not as invasive.

[00:40:27] It’s less expensive. It’s just like, let’s just see if this works. So I was meant to take hormones and I really didn’t wanna take hormones because I’m so sensitive and I’m really conscious about what I put into my body because I feel the effects. I feel like all the negative effects of everything, right?

[00:40:43] But I had come to this place of acceptance of like, okay, this is how I’m gonna get pregnant. I’m willing to take the hormones. So I’m at this retreat in Seattle and I’m meant to take the hormones the next day, and my sister’s doing her IVF retrieval so that we’re actually coinciding. And so if I do get pregnant this way, we’ll be pregnant together.

[00:41:00] So I’m meditating and I’m like, okay, just checking blind body. I’m taking the hormones tomorrow like. What is my intuition saying? And I just saw this giant red X over my pelvis and I was like, fuck. I was like, is this me overthinking it? Is this me like not wanting to take the hormones? Am I getting in my own way, like what’s happening?

[00:41:19] Went to retreat next morning. I’m like, okay, I’ve gotta take these hormones. Like I’m, the procedure is happening in a week. Like I’ve gotta start taking these hormones. So I meditated, sat down, and I was like, all right guys, like. What’s going on? Tell me what I need to do. And I just saw this giant red X over my pelvis again.

[00:41:36] I was like, damnit. I was like, all right, I’m not taking the hormones, I’m not doing the procedure and I’m not taking the hormones. I called my sister, she’s crying, I’m crying. This was the plan. It’s not gonna happen. So fast forward, uh, two weeks later, we’re in California. My sister’s doing her IVF transfer, which is like.

[00:41:55] When you transfer the embryos, you know, within the next two weeks if you’re pregnant or not. So she’s doing that. I start spotting. I think I’m getting my period. I’m really bummed out. I’m like, okay, the stars just aren’t aligned. Like, we’re not gonna be pregnant together. It’s okay. Two weeks later, I get home and I still haven’t gotten my period, and I’m like, that’s weird.

[00:42:13] Like. I’m five days late. I’m never late, and so I make my husband take a pregnancy test, and long story short, I got pregnant naturally that same month, and my sister also got pregnant s. By simply by me listening to like that Red X, do you know what, like I, I knew what my intuition was telling me and I could have just ignored it and been like, no, but like I listened to it and I got pregnant naturally that same month, and so my sister got pregnant, natural, or I, yeah, so our boys are six days apart, so that was like that whole.

[00:42:49] Period before becoming a mom was actually the initi initiation period of like strengthening my intuition because I knew I was gonna get pregnant, but it wasn’t happening. And I think that’s so hard for a lot of people. It’s like it’s not happening in the material world yet. So then we start doubting ourselves, but intuitively we know that it’s going to happen.

[00:43:08] And so it’s like building that trust within ourselves. Right. And then after I went through the postpartum insomnia stuff. I just went through the dark, like a dark night of the soul many times, and I feel like when you go through a dark night of the soul, because I wasn’t sleeping, I had so much anxiety, I was a new mom.

[00:43:28] It was really, really challenging. I, something just happens inside of you. Like, it’s like you have to hit rock bottom to. Unlock something within yourself. Do you know what I mean? And like at the time I didn’t know it, but I think going through those dark nights of the soul, it’s like I didn’t have the capacity or bandwidth to do anything.

[00:43:52] Like I said, aside from take care of my mental health and my child, and when everything else is just like there’s no distractions, there’s. Nothing else to distract you from what you’re experiencing. Like I had to go through that experience and I think going through all those emotions and not sleeping and just being in that way with myself, I mean, there’s so many different phases of the healing that I went through that led me to where I am today, which I won’t go into now, but I think when you go through a dark night of the soul, it.

[00:44:21] Unlock something within you. You remember, you know what I mean? Like you remember who you are. Does that make sense? Totally. It’s such a beautiful story. I didn’t know your boys were six days apart. Yeah, six days apart. That is so amazing. What I love about this story is that you listen to that red XI know a lot of my clients would’ve been like, I see a red X, but I, it’s probably just my mind playing tricks and I don’t know, and I’m not gonna trust it and, and, you know.

[00:44:52] And you trusted it. Sometimes the divine isn’t speaking to you in very specific words that you just, you know, they’re, the divine doesn’t always talk to you. Like you and I are talking to each other now, Sarah. Right? They talk to you in Red Xs and it’s Right. Yeah. I never get words. I get images like, you know, I’m like more like that.

[00:45:08] I get like images, you know, and you trusted it, you surrendered and that like you get so much credit for that. Because it really did like it led you to this aligned place that you’re meant to be. And it is true. Like you, you know, you had these soul contracts, you were following your higher self and with every dark night of the soul you had, you came out of it and you came out stronger, and you came out, you know, really with another calling to how you feel called to help others and to help other mothers.

[00:45:39] I mean, you. Came to me and said, Hey Alison, I have this idea for a podcast episode. And I was like, this is amazing, and this is not something I normally talk about, but it affect this very topic that you suggested affected me deeply in my life. Mm-hmm. So it’s just like, it’s such a gift. You’re giving others that you can only really give this gift as powerfully as you do if you’ve.

[00:46:01] Been there, right? If you’ve said, I did that, I experienced that, I tasted that we can read all we want in books and that’s great. Yeah. I love someone who’s read a lot of books and that is gonna gimme advice. But when you’ve been there down in those trenches and then have come out the other side, it doesn’t mean you have it all figured out.

[00:46:18] It doesn’t mean you don’t have your hard days, but you, you’re in this higher level. I mean, when you give that to others, it’s just the most priceless thing. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah, it’s been a whirlwind and that’s what I love doing is just holding space for moms. Because I think so often, like we want in our society, we we’re conditioned to give advice or to try to fix it.

[00:46:41] And the thing is, is like I believe that all the answers are within us and when we give, when we hold space for mothers or anyone who’s going through a challenging time. We give, we hold loving kind space just like horses do. Right? When you’re in, when you’re with horses, you immediately feel all the feelings you haven’t been, you haven’t felt, or you just feel safe being your true vulnerable self.

[00:47:05] When we can hold space for that space like that for mothers and people who are going through hard times, the answers come from within themselves. Like they actually know what to do. They just need the space to be held for them. We don’t have space being held for us. Do you know what I mean? There’s like so much information coming at us that it’s so hard to listen to our intuition.

[00:47:31] So that’s why I love doing these mother circles and holding space for moms because when we have the space, when we’re given the space, we actually can, can connect to our intuition in a new way and we can build upon that and that we start trusting ourselves more and more. And we don’t need to like.

[00:47:49] Start looking for the answers outside of ourselves, they’re actually here. And the more that we attune to our intuition and build that muscle, it just feels like I have friends or like I have support within me. Do you know what I mean? It’s like I, I just call on myself to find the answers. Do you know what I mean?

[00:48:09] And like, obviously I have a coach and a therapist and like whatever, but it’s just without it, I don’t know where I’d be, honestly. That’s such an important point. We have this internal guidance system. We have our higher self. We have this intuition that’s giving us guidance, right? Inviting us to turn right instead of left.

[00:48:29] And uh. It provides us with support, it holds us. It doesn’t just give us the, the, the guidance for how to move forward. It holds us as we move forward. And I think it’s very easy when we’re in our human experience and that we’re in the challenge and we feel like the humans around us aren’t understanding or reaching out or holding the space for us or even just really hearing us.

[00:48:52] Um. It can feel so isolating and so lonely and people, you know, getting back to human design, if you’ve got any individual circuitry in your human design, and most lightworkers do. Mm-hmm. And it just means that you’re kind of meant to be a bit of a lone wolf. It doesn’t mean you’re an introvert, it doesn’t mean whatever, but it kind of means you’re really blazing your own trail and you’re on your own a lot in your life.

[00:49:19] You know, the upshot is. This energy tends to kind of like to be a lone wolf and blaze the new trail, and that’s very exciting. But this shadow is you feel fricking lonely and you don’t have that support in that community. I have all individual circuitry in my chart, so I’m kind of really speaking from the experience here.

[00:49:37] But I just notice whenever I just like feel that loneliness, I’m like, okay, I’m not feeling it from humans these days. I need to get this connection and this support and this space from my. Divine guidance team. And whenever I just take some deep breaths, release the loneliness, go into my heart space and call that in that just, I just get enveloped with this feelings of connection and being supported and being held.

[00:50:00] And I realize like just like my intuition is always inside of me guiding me forward. So is this divine guidance team supporting me on my path? Right? Totally. Yeah. It’s. Anyway. Sarah, this has been such a marvelous conversation. I just could speak to you forever. You’re such a fear person in my world, um, and you’re such a gift to the people you serve.

[00:50:26] I love to ask my guests to leave our listeners with an invitation, and then I’m gonna ask you in a sec how they can find you. But, um. I know you’re a listener of the show, so an invitation is just to some homework, uh, uh, a perspective and inspiration anywhere you wish to invite our listeners to go. Hmm hmm.

[00:50:48] The first thing that came up is, um, it’s called a sit spot. So it’s basically a spot in nature where you sit for a consecutive amount of days and you just notice your surroundings. So you check in with all five of your senses and. You smell, you listen, you sense how you feel in your body, you taste and then you open your eyes and it’s just a beautiful invitation to be in nature and in your surroundings and notice what you see, what you sense, um, simply being in nature and noticing what you sense can really.

[00:51:32] Just strengthen your intuitive abilities because the trees are healing, the rivers are healing. They’re actually helping you heal all the time, and we’re always healing, even if it doesn’t feel like it. We’re always healing. And so just getting out in nature and creating your own sit spot, um, yeah, could just be really healing for you if that’s what you feel called to do.

[00:51:53] I love this invitation because I am recording this from my family farm in South Dakota and I’m just, I’m looking out the window now and I’m just like, all you see is nature everywhere and there’s so many lovely sit spots in, in, in this area. So I’m totally taking on this invitation in like today.

[00:52:12] Starting today. So that is really beautiful and I wanna say Sarah, from my heart, so much gratitude for you. Thank you so much for the work you do in the world and for sharing your wisdom today on Soul Guide Radio. Thanks, Allyson. Thank you. Thank you, thank you. Thank you. And I would love to thank you dear listener for tuning in.

[00:52:31] I’m so grateful for you each and every week. And if you’re feeling so called, head on over to wherever it is you listen, hit, subscribe and leave us a review. If you listen on Spotify, you can comment on every episode. I will read your words on the air with lots of love and gratitude, and I forgot to ask Sarah how listeners can connect to her.

[00:52:53] So, so sorry about that. I’m gonna talk about it right now. If you would like to connect to Sarah, you can find her at Instagram at Sarah Loves Happiness. That link will be in the show notes and she’s also sharing with you a free meditation to heal anxiety. You can also find that link of the show notes, and I really, really encourage you to check Sarah out because she offers some really.

[00:53:16] Really great high vibe, loving and connecting perspectives on social and in her newsletters. So check her out. Everything will be in the show notes. And as always, until next time, may your soul guide the way. Hi, dear ones, listen here. The Soul Blueprint certification program is a roadmap to becoming a more powerful coach healer.

[00:53:41] Writer, artist or entrepreneur, and then earning more money. It’s the only certification program that reveals how to activate your five unique spiritual gifts so you can create massive soul aligned success in life and business. Learn more and enroll@ allysonscammell.com/soulblueprint. Or if enrollment is closed, you can join the Soul List, so you’ll be the first to know when the next cohort is opening up, and you’ll also be eligible to receive special.

[00:54:12] High value bonuses. Again, that’s allysonscammell.com/soulblueprint

00:00 Introduction

03:40 Meet Sarah Caracciolo

06:43 Motherhood as a Spiritual Initiation

17:48 The Concept of Spiritual Initiations

24:33 Human Design and Motherhood

27:47 Reflecting on Personal Fulfillment

28:45 Balancing Work and Personal Life

31:03 Healing and Letting Go of Societal Expectations

35:05 Navigating Life’s Initiations

38:22 The Journey to Motherhood and Intuition

46:27 Holding Space for Mothers

50:45 Invitation