Healing the Bitch Wound

[00:00:00] Hey, ho, dear ones, how are we doing on this fine, fine day? We are going to be exploring something very deep and powerful and potentially painful. And so you might feel something triggered within yourself as you listen. And if you do, that’s a good thing in that it’s pointing to something that’s ready to be released.

[00:00:21] So if you can feel, it’s ready to heal. Okay? And we’re going to be talking about the bitch wound. The bitch wound is a wound. That’s mostly in women, but not only the bitch wound can also be in men and men have their own also specific type of wounding. That’s the opposite side of the bitch wound. And this comes from, this is a unique kind of wound because it actually comes from conditioning, comes from conditioning.

[00:00:57] And the conditioning, the social conditioning creates the atmospheres. inside the households, inside the schools, the work environments that then creates the bitch wound. It creates the circumstances that leads to the wounding. And this was really, really hit home to me when several months ago, I was meeting with my seven year old daughter’s And I mentioned to the teachers that Freya had been complaining that there were some girls in the class that were being unkind to her.

[00:01:35] And it wasn’t really bullying, but it was just unkind behavior and it was really bothering Freya. So I asked them about it. I wanted to draw it to their attention. And then one of the teachers said something that made me pause. She said, well, this is the age where girls start to be mean to one another.

[00:01:59] This is the age where girls start to be mean to one another. Gets me kind of emotional as I sit here and think about that. And the age was six, seven years old. I guess that’s the age it starts. Why, pray tell, are girls mean to one another, right? Where does this come from? Friends, this comes from this bitch wound and we’re born into it.

[00:02:31] We come with this baggage from past lifetime and ancestral wounding, and then we get it re branded into our system, if you will, from the age of six and younger. And the wounding comes from social conditioning around thoughts such as strong women are bitches. If you are too much, if you’re too much of a squeaky wheel, then you’re a bitch.

[00:03:00] If you stand up for yourself and speak your mind, then you’re a bitch. If you’re ambitious, then you’re a bitch. Then you’re a bitch. This is the conditioning, the conditioning we grew up with. And this is part of the wounding that we have from ancestry, from past lifetime. So why don’t we go ahead and start to decondition and rewrite And heal this wounding in today’s episode, I reveal what the bitch wound is and where it comes from, how to recognize the bitch wound inside yourself and how to heal it.

[00:03:38] I’ll end on an invitation that will have you rewriting the conditioning and healing the wounding that dulls your light. So you can step into the powerful divinely feminine being that you truly are. So please stay with me until the end. Welcome to soul guide radio a podcast for soul guided leaders, influencers, and entrepreneurs here to bring about change on a massive level.

[00:04:05] We’ll explore how you can activate your big soul mission, amplify your spiritual gifts, And clear the energy blocks weighing you down so you can gain unstoppable momentum in life and business. I’m Alison Scammell, your host and Soul Guide.

[00:04:29] Well, hello there, Soul Guide Circle. That is the name of this global and growing community of Soul Guided leaders and entrepreneurs. In the Soul Guide Circle, we are using our spiritual gifts to grow prosperous heart led businesses that are on the leading edge of consciousness. Find a link to join our closed Facebook group at allysonscammell.com

[00:04:49] or in the show notes. Today we’re talking about the bitch wound. What is this wound and where does it come from? This wound has come from The patriarchal power systems that’s been around this planet for a long, long time. And there are many reports and stories and, you know, actual history, proven history that points to times of history, specific civilizations where this was not the case.

[00:05:25] It was not a patriarchy run by men, but there were actually matriarchies where the women. Made the big decisions for the group, for the collective, they were in charge and not from a place of, I’m in charge to dominate you and control you and tell you what to do, but from, from a place of that divine feminine, where there was awareness that the divine feminine You Power of leadership is the most powerful of leadership.

[00:06:03] It’s a leadership of being. So I am being my true authentic self and you receive leadership from my being and not me telling you what to do. This is divine feminine leadership. It is one of your five spiritual gifts, your spiritual gift of leadership. It is one of being, it is what I teach and certify people on in Soul Blueprint.

[00:06:33] And in so many ways, it’s the gift that people connect to the deepest because They are most thwarted from this gift. Why are they most thwarted? Because of other wounds, but specifically the bitch wound. And it comes from conditioning by patriarchal systems trying to control women. I looked up the different.

[00:07:03] Dictionary definition of bitch and the definition is that it’s a pejorative slang word for a person, usually a woman. And when applied to a woman or girl, it means someone who is belligerent, unreasonable, malicious, controlling, aggressive, or dominant. And then here’s where the wounding comes in for men.

[00:07:28] Right? When applied to a man or a boy, bitch reverses its meaning and is a derogatory term for being what? Subordinate, weak, or cowardly. So there’s wounding here for the women who are being too powerful. And there’s wounding here for the men who aren’t being powerful enough. And this conditioning is an attempt to control.

[00:07:54] It’s systems and structures trying to keep us meek. And keep us, prevent us from tapping into that powerful divine feminine, because it’s so powerful. The pure essence of our being connected to source without the filters, without the thwarting, without these messages that you better tone it down, otherwise you’re a bitch.

[00:08:19] If you took that away, and you just tapped into the truth of who you are, you are powerful. Powerful. You are just this powerful being of light who is here to be joyful, experience, heal, love, connect to others, be in service to others. And when we’re really connected to that and connected to your true essence, then there’s just so much of this conditioning we won’t buy.

[00:08:50] It’s just not going to work on us. We’re going to see it for what it is, a false story, trying to control us, trying to get us to act a certain way, a certain submissive way. And when you’re submissive, you thwart yourself, you listen to others, you tamp down your own urges so that the power structures that be.

[00:09:21] It can remain the power structures that be. So how do you recognize the bitch wound inside of yourself? One of the easiest ways is just to go to those places where you feel like you’re too much. I am just too much. If I did that, it’s too much. When I show up in this way, it’s too much. That too much comes from the fear of coming across as overly dominant, overly aggressive.

[00:09:56] So, getting back to that bitch, right? Even if you, um, would never consider yourself a bitch, because maybe you aren’t a dominant and aggressive person, this is still the subtle conditioning that’s there, right? So, getting back to the definition of the bitch, it just, it’s like you’re being unreasonable.

[00:10:18] You’re being controlling, aggressive, dominant, if you’re too much. If you say something too bold or do something too bold, and there is a shadow here, there is such thing as being dominant and controlling. But I think that also comes from the wounding. And it’s, we’re trying to protect ourselves, right? So we protect ourselves in one of two ways.

[00:10:48] Either we withdraw and really go into our shell and we get quieter. Or we can become overly dominant, overly aggressive, then protective, because we fear that if we show our power and our light, we will get thwarted. We will get thumped down. So either way, it’s shadow. And that’s exactly what these little girls are doing and are doing in this class to protect themselves because they want to connect.

[00:11:20] They want to be accepted. They want to belong. But when they feel like that’s not happening, they get scared and go into shadow and either they withdraw, you know, from the other kids in the class or they become mean or even bullies. And in either situation, it’s a way to protect themselves. So when you think of the thought, I am too much when I, I’m just trying to think about this, like what comes up for me and when I think about this, I am too much when I, what’s coming up is when I’m very spiritual and non spiritual venues or circumstances or groups of people.

[00:12:04] And that also taps into. the witch wound that I did a whole podcast on and we’ll link that in the show notes. And I highly recommend you check that out if you haven’t yet. And that’s the wound that tells us we need to hide and thwart our spiritual gifts. Otherwise we’ll be labeled a witch. So it’s funny, my bitch wound and my witch wound are kind of related where I believe that when I.

[00:12:35] engage in spiritual ideas or practices around people who may not have a lot of exposure to it. Not only am I a witch, I’m a bitch because I am coming on too strong. It’s too much. And they won’t be able to handle it. They won’t like it. You’ll make them feel uncomfortable. That’s a big conditioning from the bitch wound.

[00:12:59] If I show up in my power, I’ll make others feel uncomfortable. So you’re thinking about your own needs instead of being in your own power. And we want to start stepping into our power because when we do that, we attract just the right people, just the right communities. The ones who are like, yes, I need this being, I need your being.

[00:13:27] This is spiritual gift of leadership and those who need your leadership in this way will find you, they’ll be drawn to you,

[00:13:41] but the only way to draw in those right people for your spiritual gift of leadership is by being the powerful you, unconditioned and unthwarted by this wound. So let’s de condition this wound. Let’s start to heal it and let’s go back to that thought you identified when you fear like you’re being too much or you just simply feel like I’m being a bitch.

[00:14:18] I’m a bitch when dot dot dot and the same thoughts coming for me. So clearly I’m a bitch when I am my spiritual self. around people who don’t have exposure or don’t like it or don’t want it. And this is a good example because there’s a piece of me that wants to tell those who don’t accept me for who I am to screw off.

[00:14:46] And I’m going to be who I am. I’m going to be my true me, my true self, whether you like it or not. And this is a defiant energy that Could be shadow and it may not be. So you want to check in. If you’re feeling very defiant, screw you, I’m going to be me, whether you like it or not, check in to see if that’s coming from a place of anger or hurt.

[00:15:14] Is it coming from a low vibrational place of pain? Then there’s healing that wants to happen. Remember, we always are our most powerful selves when we are in higher and higher vibrations. So it’s not to say that you shouldn’t be ever defiant. No, there are times we actually should be and are being called to be defiant, but what energy are you in when you are being defiant?

[00:15:42] If it’s low vibrational or painful, if it’s angry, you’re in shadow. And that can also be okay, and that can also be what’s called for if you’re fighting against a system or an injustice or somebody who’s done you wrong, or somebody you loved wrong, or there’s societal injustices, right? Sometimes it’s that anger that wakes up people and institutions for change.

[00:16:10] And if you want change to be most powerful, most lasting, eventually you’re going to want to heal that anger. Release it. It doesn’t serve you. It’s low vibrational. It, it, it takes you away from your power. And when you release that, when you’re ready and the time is right and you release it, maybe you’re going to have to in there forgive someone or some group of people, right?

[00:16:46] And it’s not to say that you’re happy. And you accept the injustices. It just says you’re in the energy of forgiveness so that you can heal and move into higher and higher vibrations and connect to the truth of your power, your true essence, your being. When you’re connected to that, you’re not angry, you’re joyful, you’re expanded, you’re elevated.

[00:17:20] You’re infinite and you are at your most powerful to affect the change you want to see in the world. Now, for the actual healing, I’ve recorded many podcast episodes on how to energy heal. This is something I teach and soul blueprint about how to activate and engage your spiritual gift of healing. I record a whole podcast episode on it in How to Self Heal, and we will link to that episode in the show notes quickly.

[00:17:55] It’s a five step process. You identify the thought that’s contributing to this bitch wound. Then you identify the emotions that are triggered 100 percent true. Then you feel those feels fully and completely. And then you deep breathe and release, release, release all this low vibrational painful energy that’s thwarting you and dulling your light so that you can reconnect back into the divinely feminine you.

[00:18:37] And you do that by then reconnecting to the heart space, and this will help you with the deconditioning where you go into the heart space after you’ve released and you ask your higher self for a message of truth, because that’s the truth of the story. That’s the deconditioning of the old story to be replaced by truth.

[00:19:06] And I would love it if we work together, you and me, men and women working together on this wound that affects us all to heal and decondition so that when Freya goes to school, when she’s an adult, to meet the teacher, to talk about her little girl, the teacher says, Oh, I’m This is the age where girls really start to connect, love, support, and lift each other up.

[00:19:39] Because that’s what we need to do. Lift each other up. And when I lift you up, you lift me up back. And together we rise through the power of our being, which is not too little or too much. It is. Just right.

[00:20:05] My invitation for you this week, my dear ones, is to check in and do any healing and deconditioning that’s ready to happen with any form of the bitch wound that you carry. Start with identifying the thought, where am I being too much? I am a bitch when? And notice those thoughts that are feeling painful or resisting.

[00:20:33] Those are the thoughts we’re looking for. Feel the feels that are triggered when that thought feels true. Breathe, release, go to the heart space and ask for a message of truth. That’s all I have for this week. My dear ones, if you are loving on this episode and I have a hunch that you received a nugget or two, Head over to the show notes or go to your smartphone, go to that place where you listen to the podcast, click on leave a rating and review, and let me know specifically what you received from this episode.

[00:21:08] I would love to know. I will read your words on the air and. Send me a DM on Facebook or Instagram. I would love to hear from you. And of course you can always reach me at Alison at Alison scam all. com. And as always. Until next time, may your soul guide the way. Hi, dear ones. Listen here, the soul blueprint certification program is a roadmap to becoming a more powerful coach, healer, writer, artist, or entrepreneur, and then earning more money.

[00:21:47] It’s the only certification program that reveals how to activate your five unique spiritual gifts. So you can create massive soul aligned success in life and business. Learn more and enroll at allysonscammell.com/soulblueprint, or if enrollment is closed, you can join the soul list. So you’ll be the first to know when the next cohort is opening up and you’ll also be eligible to receive special high value bonuses.

[00:22:14] Again, that’s allysonscammell.com/soulblueprint.

Timestamps:

00:01  Intro

04:51  Patriarchy v. divine feminine leadership

07:02  Gendered meanings of “bitch”

07:51  Control & submission

09:26  “Too much”

10:41  Protecting ourselves

11:50  Witch wound

13:58  Deconditioning

17:29  Healing the wound

20:05  Invitation & conclusion