The 7 Key Permissions to Grant Yourself When Doing Something For the First Time

When was the last time you’ve done something completely new?

Maybe it was taking a singing lesson for the first time, designing a program for your business, addressing a new issue your child is facing, or tackling that cheese souff recipe.

Seriously, how’d it go?

Were you like, “that was fun.” Or was it more, “I shoulda done better, I suck.”?

I’m a Grade A, neurotic perfectionist, so I tend to be very hard on myself. But I keep learning over and over again that is the worst way to go.

The lesson hit me hard as I’ve experienced Freya’s development milestones.

Freya just turned one and is now walking like a drunkin’ sailor. Many breakthroughs had to happen before she was able to take her first steps: holding her head, rolling over, sitting up, and crawling. And each milestone came with incredible struggle.

Here’s a video of Freya first learning to crawl at 8 months. You can see how she tries with all of her might to nudge just a centimeter forward.

During each and every milestone, she didn’t succeed on her first try or her fifth or her tenth, but she didn’t give up. She kept going, inching forward, little by little to where she is today. In a week from now, she’ll be more surefooted and maybe even drunkin’ running, and assuredly with many falls and bumped foreheads to go.

Watching Freya learn to walk has made me repeatedly ask the following question:

Why am I so damn hard on myself when I try something new??

When Freya falls down, I’m there to support and encourage her to try again. But when I fall down, I tell myself I should have done better, and I should have gotten it right the first time.

I also see this time and time again in the amazing people I coach. We have a tendency to be so hard on ourselves when we’re doing something new, and it doesn’t go exactly as we had envisioned.

Did Freya fail when she took a step and fell flat on her bum? Heavens no, she was learning. She was doing it for the first time. She had little experience to help her know how to balance or propel herself forward.

You are no different when you’re launching your website, doing a headstand, or sending your first manuscript to a publisher. You need time to learn, explore, experiment, fall, thump your head, have a good cry, dust yourself off, and most importantly, TRY AGAIN.

We’ve all heard the expression, “You must learn to crawl before you can walk.”  That’s because there’s no such thing as being able to walk on the first try – it just doesn’t happen.

I challenge you to grant yourself the following 7 permissions the next time you’re doing something new:

Give yourself permission to TRY.

Give yourself permission to FALL.

Give yourself permission to EXPERIMENT.

Give yourself permission to BE CURIOUS.

Give yourself permission to LEARN.

Give yourself permission to define success by how much you’re GROWING, EXPERIENCING JOY, or HAVING FUN.

And most importantly, give yourself permission to be GENTLE on yourself – like you would treat a baby learning to walk for the first time (because it’s no different).

In time, and with practice and gained experience, you will stand tall and walk in the exact direction you most want to go.

I’d love to know when’s the last time you tried something new? How’d it go? Post a comment below.

To you + your learning to walk, XOXO


If you’re interested, I’m very excited to offer you a “fall preview” below of the cool, fun, and transformational ways we can work together.


I offer private coaching sessions via phone or Skype or in person for those who live in the Brussels area. I specialize in helping you to: (1) Discover or fine-tune your core gifts, or the things you LOVE + feel CALLED to do; (2) Determine the most powerful + natural way to share your core gifts with others; and (3) Upgrade your time management, productivity, + efficiency skills to experience greater joy on your journey.

In addition to being a certified life and career coach, I am also an accredited and certified Emotional Freedom Technique (or EFT) practitioner. This powerful tool can help you in any area of your life where you’re struggling, and I specialize in using EFT to remove the barriers standing in the way of you and your passion pursuit.

Learn more on my coaching page, or schedule a FREE 20-minute consultation HERE.


I’ll soon be launching a FREE 10-day social media cleanse to help you use social media to TUNE-IN, not ZONE-OUT. The cleanse will help you create a positive relationship to social media – one that serves and enriches you, not distracts and detracts from the more important things in your life.

If want to be part of a focus group that is now sharing ideas on how best to use social media in a way that serve us, you may sign up HERE.


I am creating a 30-day Do-It-Yourself program to help you organize your day/week/month/life in a way to up-level your productivity, zap overwhelm, and allow joy and ease to flourish. The tailored program will help you plug into your natural bio-rhythm with step-by-step instructions on how to design your day to be as productive, balanced + joyful as possible. Be sure to add your name HERE to the First to Know List.


In early 2018, I will reboot the popular Passion Pursuit Bootcamp, which is a 6-week group coaching experience designed to help you, the busy person, get serious about doing the work you love and feel called to do. You’ll learn, the secret to gaining real momentum while pursuing your passion, a crazy effective process to pinpoint the right milestones and action steps to take to achieve your goals, and the most powerful tool I know to remove the fear and anxiety that is slowing you down. Click HERE to be added to the first to know list.


I am crazy excited to announce that in June 2018, I will be hosting a 7-day retreat on the farm where I grew up in the beautiful and serene prairies of South Dakota.

This retreat is your escape from the intensity of the modern world. It is designed to help you step off the treadmill, digitally detox, + tune into nature while learning the lost art of receiving sacred messages from Earth elements. I’ll be sending more information about this amazing opportunity in the coming weeks. In the meantime, sign up HERE for the first to know list, so you don’t miss anything.


For Brussels-based peeps, I have some cool events coming up, which you can find HERE on my new events page. On 21 Sept, I am teaming up with acclaimed Brussels-based chocolatier Laurent Gerbaud for an evening of tasting the best chocolate in the world, dreaming of your biggest passions, and figuring out with clarity the best way to chart your passions for the next 3-6 months.

I will also offer a series of EFT classes to De-Stress + Re-Connect in November and December on Thursday evenings.

Lastly, I am the organizer of Brussels Meetup: Brussels Ladies Living Their Passion. The group gets together to share experiences, inspiring stories, tools, and insights to live a passion-filled life. Click HERE to join.

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