The Uncorked Conversation
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The Uncorked Conversation Podcast with Allyson Scammell
Ep #24: Fear vs. the Discomfort Resulting from Natural Growth
Allyson Scammell: You are listening to the uncorked conversation podcast with Allyson Scammell.
Episode number 24.
Hello and welcome to the Uncorked Conversation, a podcast for soul guided passion filled women entrepreneurs who want to uncork big magic in life and business without burning out. We’ll get to the truth of how to uncork our core gifts, the ones we keep hidden inside, and how to infuse those gifts into our personal and professional life in way that feels like magic. We’ll also uncover how to truly experience the joy of the journey through smart time management and planning. I’m your host Allyson Scammell. Let’s uncork.
Hey Shantipax nation, I have a great topic for you today that really affects anyone who is ready to go bigger in their life, take a risk, up level and really reach that next level of potential that’s inside of all of us. And that is discomfort. Discomfort is part of it. And it’s not something to fear. There is this awesome thing about the discomfort that results from our natural growth and that is you get this amazing reward on the other side of it. If you raise your hand and say, “I’m going to take this risk. I’m going to confront that fear. And I’m going to do that bigger thing and be a more authentic, bigger, more powerful, more aligned version of myself.” And you follow through on that, the feeling you get of truth, alignment, satisfaction, joy, connection, contribution is extraordinary. So yes, the discomfort feels like discomfort but when you face it and flow through it, it feels so sweet on the other side.
So this is part one of a two part series where we’ll explore the discomfort associated with growth in this episode. And in episode number 25 we’ll discuss how to ease through it, because there are tools out there for us that make it easier. We don’t just have to feel uncomfortable. In today’s episode, we’re going to talk about the difference between fear and the discomfort resulting from natural growth. We’ll talk about how to tell the difference between the two and how to shift out of the fear that isn’t serving you on your path.
So let’s start with the difference between feeling what could be unnecessary fear when you want to say take a bigger risk and discomfort from taking a risk. You know, healthy, natural discomfort. I love this analogy. It’s like you’re going on a hike and you have different hiking trails you can go and you’re trying to get to the top of a mountain where there’s a very, very beautiful view. Which is your reward. Let’s say this is a strenuous hike that’s going to push you and push your climbing abilities. If you’re on the path of the discomfort resulting from natural growth, you will be choosing a more difficult hike. Maybe you’ll be going higher, climbing steeper, the terrain will be more rugged and it will be a challenge.
And so you have all the right equipment, you make your plan, and maybe something doesn’t go as planned. Maybe there’s unplanned weather that comes and makes your hike more difficult. Maybe you run out of something by accident. Maybe the hike is actually more difficult than you had anticipated. But you stay committed to getting to the top and overcoming each obstacle as it presents itself. That’s natural discomfort. And you get to the top and your reward is rest, the sweet view, the sunshine on your face, munching on a sweet apple. That sounds nice.
Now let’s imagine that same scenario and it is discomfort triggered by fear. And the fear is saying you’re not good enough to get to the top of this mountain. It’s too steep. You don’t have the right equipment. You don’t have the right expertise. So you start second guessing yourself and in the second guessing, you’re showing up as a less powerful version of yourself. So not only do you have the discomfort from difficult hike, you also have the discomfort coming from believing that you’re not good enough to make it to the top. And from that place of fear and making decisions based on fear, you pack too much in your ruck sack. You overly prepare. You include too much food. You make the hike harder and you don’t allow yourself breaks because you’re thinking you’re not good enough so you better push through, even when you’re super tired. And without the breaks, you injure yourself but you think the injury’s not that bad so again you’re just going to push through to get to get to the top of the mountain no matter what it costs.
So you’re still feeling discomfort but the fear generated by your thinking mind is making the whole experience all the harder, all the more difficult, with all the more resistance instead of the first scenario where you were confident, you planned for your hike, you did the best you could with all the information you had available. You still encountered things you hadn’t planned for on the hiking trail but you were able to adapt and overcome and believe in yourself and your abilities the whole way. So you can see the difference.
Now there’s another way to physically feel the difference between the discomfort associated with natural growth and fear. The fear that your thinking mind creates that may not be in service to you. And that is to decide exactly where it’s coming from in your body. You can feel it. So think of a risk you want to take in your life, in your business, in your career. Let’s say you’re a writer and you want to write about a painful experience from your life because you feel like others could learn and benefit from it. But you fear sharing that story, you fear sharing that aspect of yourself, yet you want to do it. You feel called to share. It’s inside of you, this story, and it wants to come out in service to the people you feel called to serve.
So when you tune into the fear/discomfort, where is it coming from? Is it coming from the heart space, the area in the center of your chest, as hesitation, as resistance? If that’s the case, that is the normal discomfort that is associated with up leveling. If it’s coming from your mind, there is likely a thought there that is triggering fear and triggering unnecessary discomfort. And maybe that thought is who are you to tell this story? Nobody wants to hear it. Your family won’t want you to share it. Your partner won’t want you to share it. Something along those lines. So when you identify that the discomfort is coming from your mind and it’s possible that you feel it in both places. You feel discomfort coming from both places. If that’s the case, you want to shift up into your mind and identify the thought or thoughts that is triggering the fear, that is triggering the resistance.
Once you identify the thought, you want to write it down and just sit with it. Feel the fear. Feel the other emotions that it’s bringing up. Feel if it’s showing up anywhere else in your body physically. Maybe it’s a tightness in the shoulders or constricted breathing. Just feel the feels. Allow it to come up to the surface. And then just start taking some deep breaths, deep breaths, let it go and shift back down into your heart. Into that heart space. And ask your heart, ask your soul what to do next. Check in with the soul. Ask your heart the question. Am I on the right path to be sharing this story? Getting back to our writing example. If you receive the answer yes, that is your calling card to write the story, take the risk, face the fear, up level.
So my challenge for you this week is to take a risk in your life. Do something bigger that you have felt called to do. Something that has been nudging you, tapping at you, saying I want to up level. I want to go bigger. I want to take this risk. Check in with the heart. Then check in to see if you’re feeling any discomfort. If you’re not feeling any discomfort, your risk isn’t big enough. Up level your risk. Whatever it is that you want to do, go bigger with it until you feel the discomfort. When you feel it, sink into your body and say where is the discomfort coming from? If it’s only coming from your heart, you are on the right track. And just tune into the heart and ask the heart for guidance as to what you can do next. And the best way to take the risk you want to take. See what information you receive from your heart. If you’re feeling anything coming from your mind, identify the thoughts. The thoughts that are triggering the fear. The thoughts the mind is creating.
Feel the feels that the thought is creating and take some deep breaths after you’ve really spent at least 90 seconds feeling the feels to let it go. In next weeks episode number 25, I will be taking this one step further to tell you exactly how you can use emotional freedom techniques or EFT to dissolve these limiting beliefs that are triggering fear on your path to being a bigger up leveled version of yourself. And I guarantee that you won’t regret being a bigger version of yourself. And you will regret staying small.
So that’s all I have to share for today. Please tune in to episode 25 where I go deeper into how we can give ourselves some ease and release during periods of up leveling and discomfort. And if you’re feeling at all tuned into this content, receiving benefits from this content, I would be thrilled if you shared this episode with a few friends, subscribed, and left a rating and review and that’s how more people can find the Uncorked Conversation. And until next time, stay uncorked.
Are you looking to create, earn, and delight in your business without feeling drained or disappointed? Then download my free video and guide that reveals a four step formula to infusing your core gifts into life and business to up level your sales, skills, and satisfaction. Find a link to get your download at my website Shantipax.com. That’s S-H-A-N-T-I-P-A-X.COM.